Monthly Archives: March 2009

I Tried Out for the Navy SEALs – How I Spent My Spring Break, Part 3

adventure

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Yes, you read that correctly: Kellee “Goat” Stooks and I, Stacy “Toes” Bertinelli (Team Limoncello), tried out for the Navy SEALs today. To say that we failed to make the team is something of an understatement. For starters, they don’t allow girls to become SEALs, but even if they did, neither of us is 28 years old (maximum age to apply), and after our performance today, I can say with some degree of certainty that we would not be among their hallowed legions.
But at least we tried … and we had fun … and we were quite entertaining in the process.
Which is to say: Each of us swam 500 yards – breaststroke or sidestroke only, because you can’t do the fly, backstroke or freestyle without coming out of the water, creating some splashy noise and making yourself into a nice target for a sniper. Then, after we managed to avoid drowning, we got to do as many push-ups as we could in 2 minutes, as many sit-ups as we could in 2 minutes and as many pull-ups as we could… period… and then we got to run 1.5 miles. Oh, and we were competing against aspiring Navy SEALs and Olympians who actually medaled in swimming in Beijing.
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And we lived to tell about it – with photos!

Continue reading I Tried Out for the Navy SEALs – How I Spent My Spring Break, Part 3 →

We Frame, We Saw, We Hammer – How We Spent Pat’s Fur-cation, Part 2

adventure

We framed… we sawed… we hammered… We doubled the size of our backyard deck by ourselves and managed to stay married in the process. Behold, the Patrick and Stacy World Headquarters Backyard Deck:
Small, Petite, Decent but Workable Before:
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Amazing, Awesome, Incredible and Humongous After:
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Go ahead and admit it, you can’t wait for Mardi Gras 2010 to trip the light fantastic on that dance floor – and no, we do not contract ourselves out. Mom already asked. And yes, I realize we said we weren’t going to spend a lot of money on our fur-cation, so you’ll be happy to know that we paid for half our materials with the coins I rolled from our change jar ($450) – though we had to take it to four different banks to get it converted to paper. Now that’s what I call recessionary economics.
You can read more about this adventure, see pictures of Stacy using an actual saw and not amputating any of her own limbs, plus learn how to persuade your wife to help you build a deck… all after the jump.

Continue reading We Frame, We Saw, We Hammer – How We Spent Pat’s Fur-cation, Part 2 →

These are My Peeps – or How I Spent My Spring Break, Part 1

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So Pat’s employer graciously offered my sweet husband a one-week, NONPAID vacation in the form of a furlough. Since he had to take this “fur-cation / vaca-lough” before the end of the first quarter, we decided to coordinate it with my Arizona State University spring break (March 9-13). Depending on how you look at it, this week-long sojourn is either a sign of the times or a sign of the apocalypse.
SIGN OF THE TIMES: Unlike my classmates who have trotted off to exotic locales (Lake Havasu) for exotic beverages (Milwaukee’s Best) and exotic endeavors (waking up in their own vomit on Dad’s credit card), Pat and I have undertaken a few household chores that we’d been avoiding – cleaning out the office and doing yardwork (more on that later). Oh, and did I mention we gave up alcohol for Lent?
SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE: Just because we’re sober, doesn’t mean we have to be serious, which is why I’ve also used this week to participate in a fun creative endeavor that I wouldn’t have otherwise gotten around to. Behold, the Washington Post Peeps Diorama Contest, 2009.
Depict an historic or cultural event by using marshmallow Peeps (bunnies or chicks) as your medium. I was inspired by current affairs and chose to re-enact “Alaska Governor Sarah Palin Pardoning the Thanksgiving Turkey.” You may have caught this on YouTube – where another turkey gets the axe in full view of the cameras. Here’s my depiction from two angles – one as though you were watching it on MSNBPeeps…
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And the other as if you were on scene with the governor, the TV crews and the decaPEEPtation.
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Now, I can’t win the contest because I am not a resident of the District of Columbia, but I hope to make the finals. Will let you know when voting commences so you can give a shout out to YOUR PEEPS (and vote early and often for me). I may actually have enough time before the weekend is done to crank out another PEEPtacular diorama, so stay tuned…