My football season is over.

In a soul-crushing span of 24 hours, both of my teams flopped around on national television and stomped my ardor back into the turf.

I admit it: After years of following Texas A&M and the New Orleans Saints, one would think I’d be satisfied with a Super Bowl victory and defeats of ranked Oklahoma and Nebraska teams in the same year… but like Icarus, we always want more – and when the bright light of expectation (and national television) shines upon us, we can bask briefly in its glory (maybe for a quarter) before we come crashing back to reality.

And this is the reality of a football fan in Arizona: Thank God that’s over, now I can go outside and do something worthwhile with my time.

As the rest of our nation suffers under the gray cloud of winter, the sun shines on our desert playground. With lows in the mid-40s, highs in the upper-60s, every Sunday is battle between the Red Zone Channel and the better angels of our natural environment: Our hiking boots, our mountain bikes, our endless skies. Now I don’t have to fret that dilemma – now my Sundays will be free from disappointment (the Arizona Cardinals, the Cleveland Browns, the Seattle 7-9 Seahawks? REALLY?) as I bask in the life-affirming goodness of tending my vegetable garden, reading books on my patio, or passing an afternoon accruing much-needed Vitamin D beside a swimming pool.

And if I keep telling myself that, I might actually believe it – because every summer, when the mercury scoots past 110, I long for the air-conditioned goodness of a TiVO’d early-season game (TiVO for 30 minutes, then watch football commercial-free). I also pine for the rare overcast day in the mid-50s (WINTER!) when we can make gumbo during the early game, taste it during the afternoon game, and eat it during the night game.

Damn you, football gods! I raise my fist in rage… and I resort to that sad balm of sportswriters everywhere – the 2010 Season Postmortem aka Closure for the Defeated. Bear with me, I’m a little rusty on this one. Continue reading Postmortem: Football in the Desert →

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States

This same First Amendment that allows us to gather on the National Lawn, or criticize our elected officials, or even take our government to court, also allows jackasses at the Westboro Baptass Church to protest the funerals of dead servicemen and women with signs that say, “GOD HATES FAGS” and “THANK GOD FOR DEAD SOLDIERS”  … Or at least it does right now: The Supreme Court is considering the case of Snyder vs. Phelps, where Albert Snyder, the father of a fallen marine, sued Westboro Imperial Wizard Fred Phelps for harassing his family at his son’s funeral.  There are some limits to free speech: The First Amendment does not allow us to yell “FIRE!” in a crowded theater, and so the Roberts Court gets to decide whether “GOD SENT THE SHOOTER” is appropriate to shout at a memorial service.

I am torn in this regard because I am a true believer in the First Amendment, having been employed as a sportswriter (pseudo-journalist) for seven years. I may not like what the Klan has to say, but I defend their right to say it. And in that spirit, I’d like to exercise my right to free speech in regards to the Supreme Grand Cyclops of Westboro and his klavern…

Continue reading Westboro Baptist Hate-Mongers →